Before I sought God, I tried to identify myself through the things I could do or be: my academic performance, whether or not I was like-able / could make friends, or my appearance. I became depressed and lacked self worth, and suffered from bad habits like bulimia. I was desperate and at my wits ends.
During my sophomore year in high school, I lost friends that I identified my worth in. I pleaded to God for help and was accepted to Westlake Academy. In gratitude, I got involved with Cross Timbers students. When I went, I gathered the courage and had the most awkward conversation of my life with some of the girls there. Despite my anxiety, I continued going and started attending Sunday Groups. One day, a student takeover night was announced and I volunteered as a speaker, despite having barely spoken to anyone. God spoke through my 7-minute sermon, and that allowed me to gain a foothold.
One of my decisions I made when I chose to follow his plan was to attempt to be fully present in life. Now, when a new student joins Cross Timbers I try to be the one that makes them feel like they belong, because I know what it feels like to be an outsider. My outlook on my future has changed. Now I know that God knows my future and is not surprised at anything. Wherever I go, he will have a place for me and will use me.
My life has changed, I do not regret feeling too much. When I finally pleaded to God to remove me from my situation, at my lowest point, he met me where I was. My identity became rooted in my relationship with Christ and what he thinks about me, not what others think about me.